Against the Odds Read online

  Against the Odds

  By Brenda Kennedy

  ***

  SMASHWORDS EDITION

  Copyright 2015 by Brenda Kennedy

  Cover Photo Copyright by Natalie Grasso Photography

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  This story is part of a trilogy. Books 1 and 2 have cliffhangers.

  Dedicated with much love to my Uncle and Aunt, Tim and Sue Angle.

  ***

  Chapter One: Living a Nightmare

  Leah

  We go to the cemetery and visit Jamie. We tell her no matter what she is our little girl, and we will always love her. We drive to Bruce’s office mostly in silence. My sobs are the only noise breaking the silence. I walk into the office through blurred vision. I can barely remember how we got here. Robert and I are led into a conference room. Bruce is already there waiting for us.

  “I’m sorry we’re late; traffic was heavy,” Robert lies.

  “That’s all right. Do you need anything? Leah?”

  I shake my head no. I don’t look at him or say anything. I can’t see through the tears.

  “No, thank you,” Robert says as he pulls out a chair for me to sit on.

  When we are both seated, Bruce says, “I haven’t opened these yet.” I look at him; he is holding up two manilla envelopes. “We have the results from the hospital and also the results from Mason and Alec’s office. Once we have the results, then we’ll discuss a game plan if we need one.”

  I nod, again. I swallow the lump in my throat. I can’t talk.

  “Are you ready?” Bruce asks.

  Robert holds my hand and says, “We are.”

  My hands are sweaty and my knees are shaking up and down. Robert tries to slow the movement of my knees with his hands, but it doesn’t work. I hear the sound of the envelope opening and I still. I can’t move. I can’t breath. I wait for what feels like hours before Bruce speaks. I hear him say, “I’m sorry.” I scream. I don’t hear anything else. I already know what the results are. If she were our daughter, he wouldn’t have started a sentence off with, “I’m sorry.”

  He continues, “Jamie is not your biological child.”

  “No!” I scream. I slide from my chair onto the floor and cry. I can’t see through my tears and I can no longer hear what is going on around me. I feel like the dark cloud has consumed me and is choking me. This is almost worse than her death. Now it’s like we never had her at all. “Jamie,” I cry between sobs.

  Robert grabs my arm and pulls me into him. I cry and try to crawl into my body. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to hear anything else. This can’t be true; this can’t be real. I hold onto Robert as if he can keep the black cloud from claiming me. It’s hovering close and I can feel it pulling at him.

  “Leah, it’s all right,” Robert speaks with a cracked voice.

  I know that Bruce is in the room, I can feel his presence, even though he is quiet. I take some deep breaths and try to control the tears.

  “Leah and Robert,” Bruce says.

  I open my eyes and sit carefully back into my seat. Robert follows me, never taking his sad eyes from mine and never saying a word. Be strong, Leah, I beg myself. Be strong for yourself and for Robert. He needs you.

  “Both results are the same? The one from the hospital and the one from Mason and Alec’s office?”

  “I’m afraid so. It says that you and Robert have O negative blood types while Jamie had B positive. Parents with O blood types can have only a child with the same blood type. There is no possible way that Jamie is your biological child. I’m very sorry.”

  “Now what?” Robert asks, quietly.

  “Now we decide what you both want to do. Do you want to meet her? Do you want visitation? Do you want custody?”

  “Yes,” I blurt out. “We do.”

  “Leah?” Robert says. “We need to think this over. We need time to think this through.”

  “Robert,” I say as calmly as I can. I am a wreck on the inside, so I need to appear calm on the outside. “It’s all I have thought about. I tried to think positively through all of this, but a part of me already knew that Jamie wasn’t our biological daughter. She didn’t look anything like you or myself. I didn’t care, she had her own beautiful, unique look.”

  Bruce interrupts and says, “Leah and Robert. I want you to understand, this won’t be easy. The other family will be very upset that their child has passed. They may say things that are unspeakable.”

  “I don’t care. If our biological child is out there, I want her.” I look at Robert and then at Bruce. “I want to see her, meet her, and raise her. Robert and I are wonderful parents, and we deserve to have our daughter to raise.”

  “Leah, I’m worried that maybe you’re not strong enough.” Robert looks at me and I can see the sadness and concern in his eyes.

  “Robert, after the accident you turned to drugs, and I got depressed. Never do I think that you’ll ever make that mistake again.” I try to smile and I hope he can see the strength in my eyes. “Please, don’t always assume that when something gets tough, that I’ll get depressed. I know you worry about me, but have faith in me. I’m not fragile and weak.”

  “I just worry about you.”

  “I know you do. This is sad news and I’ll be sad, but it doesn’t mean I’ll get depressed. Robert, we have a daughter. Our daughter is out there and she needs us. I can be strong for her.”

  Robert holds my hand and squeezes it. “I know you can.”

  “Thank you.” I lean in and kiss Robert.

  Robert

  I kiss Leah before I look over at our attorney, Bruce. “What do we need to do?”

  “You don’t need to do anything. The hospital will be in touch. I’ll let you know when they do and I’ll start preparing the paperwork to file. Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

  “It is,” Leah and I say in unison.

  We leave the attorney’s office and I call our parents to meet us at our house. Leah and I go to the florist to get Jamie some flowers. The florist also sells a variety of trinkets and Leah searches a small bin of miniature stuffed animals until she finds a bunny.

  “Jack?” I ask.

  “Baby Jack,” she corrects.

  We visit the cemetery and lay the flowers and bunny down. Leah picks the weeds and brushes the leaves away. We talk to Jamie like nothing has changed. The news we received today doesn’t change anything when it comes to Jamie. She is still and always will be our little girl. I loved her yesterday, I love her today, and I’ll love her tomorrow. No matter what.

  We drive the distance to the house mostly in silence. I know Leah is in deep thought trying to work everything out in her head. I have no idea how all this will work out. Bruce said people could say things that are unspeakable. Like what kind of things? What could anyone possibly say?

  We pull up to the house and our parents are already there waiting for us. They are on the front porch talking.

  “Are you ready, Sweets?” Robert asks.

  “I am.”

  I walk into the house after everyone. Dad and Tim are carrying bags of food. We didn’t tell them why we wanted to see them; they already knew. Leah, Sue, and Mom set the table while Tim, Dad and I set the food and drinks out. They don’t ask why we asked to meet them. Other than the clanking of the glass dishes, the room is otherwise quiet.

 
; We say a prayer before we eat and I watch as Leah fills her plate. I was worried she wouldn’t eat. We sit down and Leah begins. “Our attorney called us this morning.”

  “Are the results in?” Dad asks.

  Leah looks over at me and I hold her hand under the table. “They are. They revealed that Jamie couldn’t be our biological child,” I say. Just saying those words out loud causes a pain in my chest. I rub my hand over my heart to ease the pain. It doesn’t work.

  “I’m sorry…,” Mom begins to say.

  “Don’t be,” Leah says. “It doesn’t change anything with Jamie. She was ours and she still is. Nothing will ever change that.”

  Dad says, “What does this mean? What happens next?”

  “We wait. The attorney will contact the hospital and he’ll file a motion for us to see our daughter.” I look around the room at all the sad faces.

  “You want visitation rights or custody?” Sue asks.

  “Yes, we do,” Leah says, sternly. “She’s our daughter; we want her. She belongs with us.”

  Tim and Dad look at each other before looking at me.

  “Have you thought this over?” Dad asks. “I know she is your daughter, but have you thought about the repercussions of this?”

  “What do you mean?” I ask. Leah squeezes my hand under the table.

  Mom speaks up and says softly, “Robert and Leah, have you thought about the other family?” She pauses and then continues. “They will also want to see their daughter.”

  “Jamie’s gone; I can’t help that,” I say.

  “I understand that. What if they want to claim her body, or move her gravesite? What if they want to exhume her body and have her cremated?”

  Leah stands and runs into the bathroom. “I’ll go with her,” Sue says as she stands.

  “I’ll go, too,” Mom says.

  I stand from the table and pace the floor. “I didn’t think about that. I didn’t think for one minute about Jamie being taken from us.” I pace again and say, “We’ll lose all rights to her. They could exhume her tiny, little body and take her someplace else. We may not have access to her, ever.”

  “Robert that is a possibility. There’s no way to know what will happen. We just wanted you to consider that as a possibility,” Dad says.

  “I need to check on Leah.”

  I walk into the bedroom and I can hear Leah dry heaving. I walk into the bathroom and Mom and Sue wiping Leah’s forehead with a damp cloth.

  “I’ll help her,” I say as I dampen the cloth to make it cooler.

  She stands up and flushes the toilet. “We can’t win, can we? Right when I thought it might be easy, it’s not. Nothing we ever do is easy.” I watch as Leah walks over to the sink and washes her hands. “I love Jamie, I don’t want someone prohibiting us from visiting her grave, or relocating it.”

  I don’t know what to say. They won’t, they’re not. I can’t say that and know for certain it’s the truth. The truth is, I have no idea what will happen. We gain a daughter and we lose Jamie. “I hug Leah close to me and wrap my hands in her soft black hair. I don’t say anything. I can’t. Everything I say will be a lie. There’s a tap at the door and Leah wipes her tears before answering it.

  “I just wanted to check on you.” Leah’s dad is standing on the other side of the door.

  “I’m fine. Just facing reality.”

  Leah

  Everyone leaves and I lie down next to Robert in bed. He turns off the light and we just lie there listening to our breathing. I don’t talk, I can’t voice my concerns. The baby kicks and it reminds me of what’s important.

  A dream wakes up in the middle of the night and I walk downstairs. I pass Jamie’s room and the small nightlight is on. Jamie was afraid of the dark. I never understood it, until now. The monsters and demons can and will haunt you.

  It’s just after four and I make a pot of decaffeinated coffee. It will be a long day. I am grateful that I made arrangements with Dove and Bethany to manage the shop for me this week. Once the coffee is done, I go out onto the deck overlooking the pool. The warmth from the hot coffee warms my otherwise chilly hands. It’s a hot summer night, but I feel like I have ice running through my veins. I rest my head on the back of the chair and close my eyes. I pray to God and talk to Jamie. I can’t imagine how all of this will end up.

  I hear the jets from the hot tub come on. When I open my eyes, the lights in the pool are also on. I should have known Robert wasn’t asleep. He doesn’t sleep well, either. I look over at him and he is walking from the house to the pool naked. I have to smile. He has the sexiest body. “What are you doing?”

  He looks over at me and winks. “What does it look like?”

  I smile, “It looks like you’re trying to get arrested for indecent exposure.”

  “If I weren't in the privacy of our own home, I would say that is a great possibility. But, since I am in the privacy of our own home, I think I’m safe.” He tosses his towel on the chair before diving into the water and making a very sloppy splash that gets me wet. Robert is not only a pro boxer, he is also an expert swimmer. I know he splashed me on purpose. He is far more graceful than I am. The saying ‘float like a butterfly, sting like a bee,’ is very true with Robert. He is very light on his feet and can give a wicked punch. He resurfaces from the water and asks, “Are you coming in?”

  I don’t need to think about it twice. I stand up and remove my nightgown and panties. Before I was pregnant, I would have walked sexily over to him, now I just waddle. The baby kicks me and I rest my hand on my belly. I don’t dive in, Robert meets me at the stairs and offers his hand for support. Once I am submerged in the water, he cradles me and carries me around in the pool, like an infant in his arms. With my arm draped lazily over his shoulder, I rest my head on his chest. “I love you,” he says, kissing me.

  I kiss him back and say, “I will always love you.”

  Robert

  I kiss Leah and carry her around the pool. The water makes her feather light, but I pretend to struggle carrying her. She laughs and splashes water on my face. Her belly bobs in and out of the water and I smile. After we swim in the pool, I soak in the adjoining hot tub while Leah sits on the edge dangling her manicured feet in the water.

  “This feels nice,” she says, closing her eyes.

  “It does.”

  I know that Leah’s mind is racing with thoughts about the DNA results. I walked outside naked as an attempt to take her mind off it. My wife suffers from depression after the loss of our daughter and I didn’t realize how fragile she was until we received the news that Jamie may have been switched at birth. Now that we know for sure that Jamie was switched, just the thought of that brings bile from my stomach to my throat and I swear I can taste it. I don’t want Leah sinking into depression again. It won’t be good for her or the baby.

  I look at the sky and the sun is starting to rise.

  “Ready to go in, Sweets?”

  “Now you’re worried about your modesty?” she jokes.

  I look over at the neighbor’s house and the light comes on inside. “It’s not my modesty I’m worried about,” I say as I nod to her.

  She looks down at her naked body and suddenly becomes very shy. I laugh as she tries to cover herself with her small hands. She looks over at the neighbors like she is expecting to see someone standing at the window.

  “Stay here,” I say.

  I stand and get the towel for her. “Thank you, but what about you?”

  “Sweets, if they want to look at this, let them. I’m pretty sure it’s not me he wants to see.

  We go inside and I turn off the hot tub jets and the pool lights.

  “Are you hungry?” she asks.

  I am, but I know Leah needs her sleep. I’ll eat once she is asleep.

  “No, let’s go back to bed, I’m tired.”

  “Me, too.”

  It doesn’t take long before Leah is in a restless sleep. She jerks and moves in her sleep and I know that her subcon
scious won’t let her rest. I don’t move or get up. Instead, I stay with her. I feel the need to be as close to her as I can. I try hard to not think about the test results: although it’s all I can think about. Is our daughter loved and taken care of? Is she from a good home? What if she isn’t? What if she’s beaten and battered and unloved? I can taste the bile again and I shift my thoughts to better days.

  “Daddy, I want this one.”

  “Princess, are you sure this is the one you want?”

  “Yep, he’s got big soft fluffy ears.” I watch as Jamie rubs the bunny’s face along her face and across her closed eyes. “And he’s pink,” she smiles.

  That’s enough for me to buy the entire stock of stuffed animals for Jamie, if she were to ask me. It’s so hard to say no to her. I pick her up and carry her to the register and pay for her new purchase. Jamie runs into the house to show her momma her new toy. It’s not just a toy, but her new family member. I know from past experiences that this new stuffed animal will be with us as a family twenty-four hours a day and seven days a week.

  I look on the bench, at the foot of the bed and sure enough, there sits Jack. Jamie’s beloved stuffed animal with big pink floppy ears. He doesn’t look new anymore but resembles more of a rag doll, instead.

  I remember the day she told me to take care of Jack for her.

  “Daddy, I have to go.”

  “Jamie, stay, I need to make sure you are all right. We had an accident.”

  “Daddy, I need to go. I love you and mommy so much.”

  “Where are you going?” I try to open my eyes, but they refuse to open.

  “I need to go with grandma. Daddy, it is so pretty, and you should see all the pretty flowers.”

  “Jamie, don’t leave me, I love you,” I cry.

  “I love you, too, Daddy. Grandma is waiting for me. Take care of Jack for me.”

  Jack is now dirty and he no longer smells of Jamie. Leah and I couldn’t bring ourselves to wash him. Not after the accident and not now. I stare and Jack and I hold Leah as I pray for the best possible outcome there is.

  Leah stirs and I still. I close my eyes to appear to be sleeping. Leah doesn’t say anything and she doesn’t move anymore either. I open one eye and she is watching me. “I knew you weren’t asleep. I close my eyes and fake a snore. She tosses a pillow at me and begins to laugh. Opening my eyes, I have to laugh, too.